Complicated
by shoppinglegends
Summary: Brendan claims he is finally ready for a relationship with Ste. But can he stop himself from messing it all up before it really even begins again? Oneshot


**A.N. I've had this on my computer for a very long time and just never got round to touching it up and editing it. I still haven't but decided I should just put it up or I'll never do so. So hope you enjoy and please review! I'm considering leaving this as a one shot or possibly continuing - depending on the response I get! Enjoy! xx**

* * *

Brendan frantically ran around the club, trying to fix it up. It was a big day, everything had to be perfect for him. For the love of his life. It wasn't just a physical need anymore. It hadn't been for a while. He just wouldn't admit it to himself, Steven meant something now. He meant everything.

Stopping for a second he looked around at his 2 hours work, the flowers were nicely placed in a vase on the table, all the perfect height. Candles outlined all the walls, soft romantic music was playing in the background, not loud enough to disrupt conversation but audible enough to make out the lyrics. Champagne was in the fridge, Brendan was dressed in his finest suit. Everything was done. Now the only thing on the checklist left was the guest of honour. Steven.

Also half way through I got bored of thinking of inventive ways of saying 'he said, she said etc' so I just did the character's name in bold.

* * *

'STEE! You can't let him do this! You can't just run off to him because he asks you to. You're still not over him are you?' Doug yelled.

'I'm not alright? He's me landlord! He can evict me, Amy and the kids if I don't go! Look I told you alright? I love YOU, Doug, YOU not Brendan ok?' Ste said trying to calm him down, pulling Doug in for a kiss.  
'Look I'll be back as soon as I can alright? Just look after the shop. I'll be back before you know it.' With that Ste hurriedly ran out heading for the club.

* * *

Brendan heard a bang, the club door and someone clambering up the stairs.

'What do you want Brendan? I'm sick of all these games right? Ste exclaimed, running up the stairs, two at a time.

'They need to...s.t.o.p...' Ste trailed off as he looked around at how different the club was. It had been turned into a romantic room, nothing like what it was like during normal circumstances.

'What is all this?' Ste asked, confused. 'Never saw you as the romantic type!'

'So you think this is romantic eh? Good to know...' Brendan muttered, quickly in reply.

'Its for you, Steven. Everything is for you.' Brendan replied, waving his arms out to show off the room, his eyes not wavering from Steven.

God, that boy looked good, didn't he? Did he ever not?

'Brendan...' Ste sighed, clearly exhausted already by Brendan at this point.

'These attempts, games, whatever you call them. They have to stop. I'm with Doug now. I love him. So all this'...Ste said waving around his hands...  
'this...can't be for me.'

Silence held the room, only broken by Brendan shuffling.

'You love him...' Brendan let out a nervous chuckle. 'You don't love him. You love me. Don't you remember? You said you loved ME.'

'Yeah that was before you beat it all out of me. Every last feeling I had towards you. You hurt me more than anyone ever has.' Ste said bitterly

Brendan winced, pushing aside the memories he had of hurting Steven.

'Don't you think I cared when you came straight back to me after you broke up with Noah? Don't you think I hated the idea that I was just a rebound for you after Noah cheated on you with Sean? I didn't want to be just a rebound. I wanted you. Completely.'

'You had me completely, I was in the palm of your hand. You knew that. But as usual, Brendan Brady has to go and mess everything up because he is too much of a coward to admit his feelings.' Ste retaliated back.

'But isn't that what I'm doing now? Giving you all you've ever wanted?' Brendan questioned.

'But you don't mean it! I don't want you to be doing this because you want to please me! I want you to mean it genuinely from the bottom of your heart. And a little part of me doesn't think you do. And that little bit of doubt will never go away.' Ste spat and turned to descend the stairs he had just ascended a moment ago.

'Look, don't go. I...I'm not making myself the victim here alright? I'm not. But don't you think I'm hurting too? Don't you think I want to kill someone when I see...when I see you with the other guys? With Noah? And now Doug? You were happy, happy with someone else, with someone that wasn't me. They weren't me. Each time, I thought you would find someone else, someone to fill my place. I'm tired of it. I don't want to wait around anymore. For the possibility that one day, one day everything you feel for me is gone and I can't get you back anymore. That you'll fall in love with someone else. Someone that's not me. So please...just hear me out.'

Ste turned around and looked at Brendan.

'Do you know what the sad thing is Brendan? That you are probably being genuine for once in your life. But I can't even believe you now. I thought I could read you but I can't. I thought I knew you better than anyone else. You said you loved me and I fell for it, and what did you do? You turned around and threw me to the dirt right afterwards. Like you said Brendan, you were using me. You've just tricked yourself into thinking you actually love me. You don't. You're not capable of love.'

'I've changed. I promise. Please. Just don't leave me again. I can't cope. I really can't.'

'Brendan, we're not right for each other. Just let me go. Look, we need some space between us. Just leave me alone and you'll see. Your life will be the same without me yeah? Like you said. I meant nothing.'

With that, Ste walked out, vowing himself to never look back, to never even consider the possibility of looking back and what could've been between Brendan and him. This was the right route to take. This was the only option.

* * *

**THREE DAYS LATER**

3 days and not a word, 3 days and Ste hasn't seen Brendan once, he was actually surprised to say the least. He expected Brendan to stride into the office immediately hours after their last encounter and have his poker face on like nothing had ever happened. But that event never happened.  
Even Doug was getting suspicious.

'What exactly did you say to him?' Doug asked, worried. 'Brendan Brady has not been around for days...how is this possible?'

'Nothing.' Ste said 'I just told him that I loved you and to leave me alone. Maybe he finally got bored of all the games.'

'Hmm..maybe' Doug mumbled, not entirely satisfied with his boyfriend's answer.

They continued working and the day went by quite smoothly, no major problems and soon it was time to shut down.  
'I'll close up if you want? Don't you have to get home for the kids?' Doug asked.

'Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow alright?' Ste said, giving Doug a kiss while taking off his apron and heading for the deli door.

'See ya later!' Ste shouted back at Doug and stepped out into the fresh air.

'Oh Ste! Just the person I was looking for!'

Ste turned his head to see Cheryl running down the stairs in 6 inch heels.

'Hey love, would you just mind if I talked to you for a second? You ain't got anywhere you have to rush off to do ya?'

'No no...whats up?' Ste replied.

'Well, I know you're with Doug now and everything and I don't mean to be stepping over any boundaries but...did something happen between you and Brendan a couple of days ago? The only reason I'm asking is cos I walked into the shut club with him drunk, passed out on the couch with flowers and candles everywhere. Was that for you?'

Ste hesitated, unsure of what to say. 'Er...look Cheryl I don't really think I should get involved with Brendan anymore. I told him how I felt and we're finally done. Once and for all.'

'So it was for you...' Cheryl said amazed. 'Wow. I've never seen him make that much effort for anyone before. All the years I've known Brendan, he has never done something like that for anyone. And he certainly has never gotten that drunk and depressed about anything before. He really does love ye. Oh..I'm sorry - I'm overstepping now.'

Cheryl looked at Ste. Unsure how he was going to react.

Ste knew he had an effect on Brendan, he knew Brendan cared. Deep down he knew ending things with Brendan once and for all would finally hit Brendan hard, and as much as he hated feeling this way, he did feel shit for what he was putting Brendan through.

'Look Cheryl,' Ste said quickly 'I've gotta get going. I'll see you around.'

With that, Ste ran off in the direction of his house, his mind mixed with all sorts of emotions. Unable to distinguish if what he felt was pity, or care for the Irish man.

* * *

'I'm home!' He called out as he stepped into his flat.

'Hiya! How's your day been?' Amy asked giving him a peck on the cheek.

'Yeah good.' Ste replied 'No Brendan Brady again today. But I did have a really weird conversation with Cheryl just now.'

'Why what happened?' Amy asked.

'Nothing really. She just said that Brendan has been really depressed since that thing I told you about and she's been finding him passed out drunk.' Ste said, shrugging as if it was a careless matter.

'He's still in love with you isn't he?' Amy said, or rather stated.

Ste looked at Amy, surprised and shrugged 'Na. Brendan Brady doesn't love anyone. He's just a sore loser. I'm just a game to him, and he didn't win me, nothing more to it.'

Amy hesitated, unsure as to whether she should say what was on her mind. For once, she was going to say something which might even help Brendan. Help him and Ste get back together.

'You know, I went to talk to him once. When Rae first got pregnant. I just wanted to make sure that you and him were over. Once and for all. But boy, was I not prepared for what happened when I told him.' Amy said.  
'He was broken, lost for words. His usual cool hard exterior was cracking. His poker face went out the window. It was plain obvious. He loved you. And he knew then that it wasn't a matter of love or wanting you anymore. It was involving a new human being's life! You needed to be a dad for Rae's baby. He said he would break it off with you.'

Ste suddenly flashed back to that time, when Brendan had lied and said he was just using Ste. Ste had refused to accept that. He had refused to believe that what had been one of the most intimate, amazing nights Ste has ever had with another human being was just sex.

And the kiss. The goodbye kiss. It was as if Brendan hated the fact that he would never kiss Ste's lips again. And that is really what Ste thought was going to happen.  
As Ste thought back to the time, he realised how much he had come in the past year. Back then, he didn't have a backbone. He was completely in love with a man who probably didn't reciprocate the intense feelings. And now he was in a relationship with a man who truly loved him. Who was sweet, and kind and nice.

Nice. That is such a stupid word. Nice.

Noone wants to be called 'Nice'. It was almost like some go to word for anyone you didn't have a particular opinion towards. 'Oh you're nice.'

Yet that was what Ste felt about Doug. He was nice. Don't get me wrong. Ste loved him. Ste was sure of that. But was it just love for the idea of a perfect, uncomplicated relationship? Something as far from the distorted one with Brendan?

Snapping out of his thoughts, Ste replied to Amy 'From what you're saying Ames, it almost seems like you're encouraging me to go talk to Brendan.' Ste laughed sarcastically.

'Look,' Amy said, getting all serious. 'All I'm saying is that I know Brendan loves you. You can tell. I'm not saying all the horrible things he has done to you can be made up by the fact that he loves you. But I don't want you going through life regretting that maybe you chose the wrong guy. Don't get me wrong, I will still hate Brendan Brady with all my heart for what he has done to you in the past. But at the same time, I have never seen you happier than when you were with him. That split second when your eyes fill with such hope that he would take you to the next level.'

Ste didn't know how to handle all these opinions of others. He had to sort out his own and not be influenced by everyone around him. Had Brendan really changed? If Amy, someone who he trusted with his life, someone who hated Brendan could even see a change in Brendan, could see that Brendan truly loved Ste, maybe there was chance for him and Brendan. Maybe it wouldn't just be a dream anymore. It would become reality.

* * *

Ste lay awake that night, sleep escaping him. Just thinking about Brendan gave him goosebumps, reminiscing about the old times, make believing would could be their future, their fairytale ending...who was he kidding? Ste thought. Brendan and him would never have a fairytale ending. Things were just too messed up.

But how would he know if he didn't give it one last chance? I know I know, Ste thought to himself, I've given Brendan a million and one chances. But its different this time..no? He's gone further to please me, he's tried harder! Maybe he is ready to talk about it now. About it all.'

Turning to his bedside table, and checking his phone, Ste saw the time read 4:44am. Call him superstitious or whatever, Ste made a quick wish and decided this would be the perfect time to act upon his thoughts and go speak to Brendan about everything. Lay all his cards on the table and hope Brendan would do the same.

Throwing on his favourite hoodie and zipping it up, Ste dug his hands deep into the pockets of his sweatpants and sneaked out of his flat quietly. Walking through the village, he breathed in the fresh air and glanced up at Chez Chez. From his working days there, he knew the club shut at 4 but he could just make out a small light slipping out from under the door and he smiled knowing it would be Brendan in the office.

Pushing open the door of the club -  
'Brendan, I don't know how you do this to me every time. Maybe I'm an idiot for saying this but lets give it a go.' Ste shouted as he walked nearer the office door.

'I love...'

Ste stopped, freezing as he let the office door open wider.

In front of him, was the man who had days before, declared his love to Ste. Had said he wanted Ste, but was now half naked.

And he certainly wasn't alone.

Time stopped. The room froze. Brendan looked at Ste, not able to shake his expression of sheer horror.  
Ste just started at them, his eyes starting to fill with tears. 'You...' Ste stuttered.

Ste wanted to run away, he wanted to keep running as far as possible. Brendan Brady had managed to hurt him again. This time, Brendan hadn't even said anything, hadn't even touched him and yet Ste's heart shattered into even more pieces than was thought possible.

Recovering from his temporary paralysed state, Ste stalked up to Brendan and gave his best attempt at a punch.

'Oi - what the hell do you think you're doing?' the stranger said, blocking Brendan and ready to take on Ste.

'Walker!' Brendan said harshly.

'Leave dressed...NOW' Brendan whispered. He pushed Walker aside and looked at Ste sheepishly.

'What the fuck? You gonna let this prick come in and ruin...' Walker began

'Just shut up!' Brendan hissed, rushing to get dressed. Trying to do so before Ste had the chance to leave.

'You love me eh?' Ste stated. 'What a load of bullshit. I should've known. I'm such an idiot!' Ste shouted frustrated, running his hands through his hair, pacing back and forth. 'I'm done.' He determined and ran out, still trying to process everything.

'Wait! Steven!' Brendan yelled, running after Steven. Trying to throw on his shirt while chasing after Ste. 'Just WAIT!'

_**I didn't think this was a particularly good one but please**_ _**review anyways and tell me what you think! xxx**_


End file.
